(no subject)

Jeffrey,

Thank you for always taking the time. I appreciate a harsh word or five. I do well with criticism. Though It was a little hyperbolic of your buddy to tell me he wouldn't hire me as a waitress. Please. Let's not get carried away. I learned to read in first grade so I would never have to do a job like that. And I'm not in NY to look for a "busy work" job. I don't need to leave LA for that. I can just work as a receptionist in a dentist's office.

I don't like to defend my seriousness. Or my intentions for working with an NGO I've been involved with most of my life. It's the only organization that has made any difference in that region and I will always support it. If one can help -- one measly week out of an entire year where one otherwise indulges oneself — then one should. My mother and father are involved and right now, while I don't have money to donate, I can donate my time and I do. But I DO understand that if I were gung-ho about any old job at I would be doing photocopies for Leon while he's in Greece. No question about it. And aL ing down his door instead of waiting for him to show me what's on offer. But there IS no job, and is not a place where I can magically create a position. I'm either in Editorial or I'm in Sales. It's pretty simple. It's an antiquated business and it's not going to change any time soon. I'm not going to become more serious because I helped to put together a book here or there when I'm not on staff as an editor with the autonomy to commission several projects at once. I'm not a 23 year old assistant. Freelance publishing (god knows if that even exists) also isn't a real way to make money. If there's not enough money in showbiz there CERTAINLY isn't enough money in publishing. And part of our discussions have always been about my becoming "gainfully employed" not continuing down this dead-end path of freelancing. I know what that leads to. You're always running to catch up. The appeal of this phantom opportunity was that I could be creative and use my resources (my perspective, my instincts, my eye, my taste and my intelligence) to make beautiful, smart, non-rarified books that appealed to a broad, young book-buying audience within a full-time position.

I have publishing houses asking me to write novels, and while I've been shirking a response, I know that is what I really should be doing. I'm just beating around the bush trying to be an editor at when someone should be MY editor.

I understand you connected Leon and me, hoping for something beautifully synergistic and I believe that Leon wants in some ways to help me, but I don't believe there is a position, and no, apart from being totally and utterly qualified, I have not demonstrated that I am PASSIONATE about doinga, tl because, entre nous, I may not be. I'm passionate about working and the dream position at would marry a lot of things I'm interested in and am good at, but it's not my life work. My life will be determined by what I write, good or bad, and I have to get into the mud to find out. But in the meantime, I want to maximize the time I do have to do what I can before I knuckle down. Which I do, seriously.

I looked at the writing program for fall at the New School and it's FANTASTIC. I've picked out a selection of 4 classes, all of which take place at night and some of which are online. It's a perfect syllabus with great professors and it starts at the end of August. It would be an ideal way to kickstart my novel. Now or never, to paraphrase Seneca. What do you think?

EFTA00966776

did you enclose the classes or are you referring only to the concept . ?

These are the 5 classes I would take starting August 26. I may wind up only choosing 4, but I really want to be fully immersed.

EFTA00966775

looks great. we need to speak, I am happy to pay for your school . as some of these classes are daytime, and the last hs no time . Im not sure of your plans.re work. I have tried to understand , i am respectful of your charitable work, . I think if i were in your place i might have brought back a souvevir or some sign of a modicum of apprecation for having an apt in ny . and the assistance from me that you have received, I know you are smart. if this is all about money, lets have the discussion. It might be awkward for you , i will wait to have it on your time,

you tell me you want to be productive , independent and free.

Jeffrey Epstein

I'm sorry it's taken me til noon to get back to you. I fell into a rut of cleaning the apartment and spent the last hour on the horn with my father. I won't bore you with the details but he said: "you are not an editor. You are a writer."

With regard to my thoughtless behavior below: You are absolutely right and I'm a lout. My mother would kill me. I thought I had the summer (until you returned) to come up with the most suitable expression of my affection and appreciation for you. And I shouldn't have waited. All the same there are no souvenirs from Bosnia I could foist on you as they are all food oriented. ;) I am still on the hunt. But in the meantime, my gratitude for your time, your generosity, your interest is boundless. And I know it's not unconditional. I know you are not my family as much as I can see you are doing your utmost to treat me that way. What do you imagine you want from me in return? Is there a way I can be helpful to you?

As far as the nitty gritty of my schedule is concerned... The day time class may have to bite the dust and the class with no set schedule is an online class that does not meet.

Yesterday I met with an editor at who suggested I work out a column idea for the magazine and site. I am [ ] already writing about my Bosnia trip for the magazine and today I will send over a proposal for the column. If you are interested I will cc you. I was also told yesterday that the short we are shooting for 10 days in August is to become a feature length film, which is exciting. And of course there is Rohwolt, the huge German publishing house that have requested a novel from me. These are all real opportunities I can get behind and could generate an income, if only modest.

Are you still in NY? How was the opera? Please thank Steve for the almond croissant and the advice.

Do you like rhubarb? I just made some rhubarb jam and it goes very nicely with vanilla icecream. Or on a peanut butter and jelly sandwich.

Sent from my iPhone