Origins of the lower self - root cause of insensivity

Hi all,

Here are a few words I have put together about something that effects us all to some degree, this is a part of Pathwork teachings.

Hope you enjoy the read, for those of you not wishing to receive these messages pls notify me and I will take you off the mailing list (otherwise text me STOP ALL! ;))

Eman x

Dealing with the lower Self-

As children, we were intensely vulnerable and helpless, when we experienced spontaneous but painful emotions activated by negative experiences in childhood especially with parents and when neither the expression of our grief or anger was accepted by our parents, we learned to suppress our spontaneous feelings. We constructed a mask to cut off our natural feelings in an attempt to resist or escape painful experiences.

The child who feels hurt, rejected, helpless and experiences pain and deprivation often finds numbing of his feelings the only protection against suffering, this is a realistic protective device, a defence mechanism, but when numbness is maintained long after the circumstances have changed and when the personality is no longer a child then rigid defenses have been constructed. Every child will resist parental limits, healthy parents can meet these reactions firmly, but lightheartedly, not taking the child's self importance too seriously, however if the child's spontaneous reactions are heavily squashed by the parents continuously, they will go underground where they remain unresolved, only to erupt later in life especially in times of stress or crisis.

Sometimes this suppression feels like a physical restriction, an inability to talk even when the individual has decided to share something vulnerable about themselves, they cannot get the words out for the fear of what might come out if they let themselves be real and open with others, hence resulting in furthering their pain "My Victory is not caring, I will never let them know how hurt I am!" and instead they choose to remain in proud isolation, staying in pride and separateness resisting vulnerabilty.

Numbness and insensivity towards one's own pain and inner conflict turn into numbness and insensivity towards others, it enables one to see others suffer without the discomfort of any pangs of conscience. Passive indifference may not be actively evil as committed cruelty, but it is harmful in the long run.

Humans are endowed with free will, which allows us the choice between egocentricity, separateness or humble reconnection - hence the start of the battle between the dualistic positive and negative impulses that we constantly face in our daily lives.

Here is an explanation in non personified terms more compatible with Buddhist cosmology; Consciousness thinks and wills, since the possibilities are endless, consciousness can explore itself by confining itself "See what happens" at it were. It experiences by contracting instead of expanding, instead of unfolding it tries further to draw in, instead of experiencing further light, it wants to see how 'It is' to feel and experience darkness.

There may lie a 'special fascination and adventure' just to tentatively try out the limitation and see what darkness would feel like, then it begins to take on a energy of it's own, for everything that is created has energy invested in it and this energy is self-perpetuating, it takes it own momentum. At some point the consciousness which has created for so long these channels cannot reverse the course and gets lost in it's own momemtum and has lost touch on how to recall itself and we have begun to call 'misery' our friend.

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This is a view of the cosmic drama, it suggests that we have chosen to explore a part of ourself that is separated because it exists as a possible choice. However, the more we explore this part which has been cut off from creation, the more inevitably we encounter pain and loneliness until we start to reverse our choices and begin to reconnect again to ourselves and others. It is a part that must be faced and overcome within the self, it is the task of every human being on the road of evolution, lifetime upon lifetime, something we must all overcome.

When we can feel our own pain, we can be open to the suffering of others, hence we are much less likely to inflict cruelty onto others. Every time we have chosen fear, revenge or numbness over love, courage and connecting with others, we have frozen a piece of ourselves, we eventually need to face and release this pain we carry through the help of our mature/developed parts of ourselves and overcome these ancient wounds.

It does not matter if you believe in reincarnation or an evolutionary plan or anything else, what is important is to look within the self truthfully, face our own evil in knowing that it is not the ultimate reality but a distortion of our divinity.

It's not WHAT we achieve in our life that's really important, it's WHO we become in the process. The greatest legacies are not written on marble but in people's HEARTS.

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