(no subject)

Why ?? If it&#=9;s to expensive I will go out of my budget

C=n I please ask Lesley to book me a flight to Paris on the 1st ? Valen=ino invited me to a big event on the 2nd and I also have=to go at Chanel for the fitting

you need to behave and grow up, when i t=lk to you or spend time you whine cry , complain. . 4>=A0 its is boring. tiresome and dreary. .4o=A0 you have lied over and over but i still help , =nd know that if i don t force you to do things you will go on contin=e on a path, to nowhere

Jef=rey I think you hate me... I have the impression you are trying to cut me =ut of your life. You tell me you are sick but then you spend the day with or I don't know who. It's been almost a wee= you are in Paris and you didn't even tell me you were coming. The fac= that you are in Europe and you don't want to see me makes me believe =hat I'm not so important for you since it's more than 6months that=we don't see each other... I would prefer for you to be honest wi=h me instead of making up excuses, same as when I wanted to come to NY. I =now you have a girlfriend and you don't want her to know about me but = don't understand why, since we are not together or even seeing each o=her. I thought we were friends...?

I'm a 100% gratefu= everyday for what I have and what you give me, thank you. I don't kno= how I would make it without you and your support... What I know=is that I will always defend you regardless of what people say and wi=I always be by your side if you have any problem. I really have a lot of r=spect and affection for you this is why seeing this whole situation and th= way you are distancing yourself from me makes me extremely sad... </=iv>

Today, I found a job despite the fact that I know that none of you= girls in NY is working. I know you are trying to help me (thank you).=A0but I don't understand this contradiction. I hope that one day = will be able to make my way through life. I'm sure I have a lot of de=ects and I understand I have to grow and that I have a lot to learn a=out how things really work but I don't see myself as horrible as you s=y I am.

Maybe you will not like this message and will take =t as a whining but contrary I believe that venting my pain is healthi=r than suppress it with drugs. I prefer to be honest and clear with y=u instead of pretending of being ok when I'm not. By writing you this =essage I'm leaving aside my pride since I believe a relationship with =o communication is fake and I don't want to be fake with you.

Love you...