(no subject)

i wont respond to stupid questions. they each did many kind things and almost never lies cheat steal. the comparison makes you look silly

wrote: Can I please ask Lesley to book me a flight to Paris on the 1st ? Valentino invited me to a big event on the 2nd and I also have to go at Chanel for the fitting

can you tell me why i should be proud of what you have done in the past three months. since monaco.?

I'm sure there is the good and the bad and I'm also sure EVERYONE is black and white BUT there is also who is more talented to hide the bad from the good. I don't have this talent.

Jeffrey I think you hate me... I have the impression you are trying to cut me out of your life. You tell me you are sick but then you spend the day with Wandy or I don't know who. It's been almost a week you are in Paris and you didn't even tell me you were coming. The fact that you are in Europe and you don't want to see me makes me believe that I'm not so important for you since it's more than months that we don't see each other... I would prefer for you to be honest with me instead of making up excuses, same as when I wanted to come to NY. I know you have a girlfriend and you don't want her to know about me but I don't understand why, since we are not together or even seeing each other. I thought we were friends...? I'm a 100% grateful everyday for what I have and what you give me, thank you. I don't know how I would make it without you and your support... What I know is that I will always defend you regardless of what people say and will always be by your side if you have any problem. I really have a lot of respect and affection for you this is why seeing this whole situation and the way you are distancing yourself from me makes me extremely sad... Today, I found a job despite the fact that I know that none of your girls in NY is working. I know you are trying to help me (thank you) but I don't understand this contradiction. I hope that one day I will be able to make my way through life. I'm sure I have a lot of defects and I understand I have to grow and that I have a lot to learn about how things really work but I don't see myself as horrible as you say I am. Maybe you will not like this message and will take it as a whining but contrary I believe that venting my pain is healthier than suppress it with drugs. I prefer to be honest and clear with you instead of pretending of being ok when I'm not. By writing you this message I'm leaving aside my pride since I believe a relationship with no communication is fake and I don't want to be fake with you. Love you...