Re:

I have left Paris for California. I wish you well. I have little reason to trust anything you say. after many times promises, agreements, pledges all broken. To suggest that my giving in to your crying, whining, and stupidity, was the wrong thing to do and I should have not helped earlier is typical of your convoluted way of thinking.

I have never said that. You are so used in manipulating people that you constantly have to twist the sentences your way. What I said is that you don't let a child drive alone a car that YOU gave him and let him go faster when he doesn't know how to drive just because he is having fun when you are aware he is going to crash BUT you don't kick him out of the car either. You sit next to him and you teach him how to drive by turning the steering wheel if he goes off track and pulling the brake if you need to (you can't do that through a phone or by email).

What you have done after giving the car to the kid is kicking him out after he drove too fast leaving him alone with no car in the middle of the highway saying "I wish you well" knowing he is going to die hit by another car.

End of the story: the kid is obviously happy and grateful he received a car as a gift because without it he couldn't have driven until where he is now. However he cannot continue the journey stranded on a highway.

quite the contrary you tell the child, you don't know how to drive it takes time to learn. the kid STEALS the car and crashes it. you forgive him, you tell him his actions have consequences, but he steals the car again, runs over some other kids, and then whines that he doesn't know how to drive.

I truly apologize for my mistakes and behavior in the last 2 years. Please tell me what I should do and I'll do it. What results should I bring? I'll do anything for it. I cannot make it through life without you. You are the only person who can guide me, I've got no one else.

I have a last question. What happened about Cartier and school was 2 years ago. I apologized many times and you know how sorry I was and I am. You forgave me and we kept talking to each other. Exactly 6 months ago, in November we saw each other in Paris and everything was normal. Just after, when I started working for Alaia you started distancing yourself with no reason, recalling something that happened 2 years ago. My last question is: What did I do in November to deserve this? Is it because I told you I was sad we didn't sleep together the last time I saw you? Because it's since that moment that everything became weird. Please tell me the truth.

stealing the car, lying about knowing how to drive (which you also did). at some point the kid says, yes I DID IT. i have no one to blame but myself. please don't write me anymore I find it painful to read

True. I have no excuses. The only thing I can tell you is that I'm trying to do better by learning from my mistakes in order to not repeat them. I've wasted my time by going to parties instead of being serious. Everything was confused in my mind and I didn't really know what path to take, it's very easy to get lost when you are young, especially into fake illusions. Still now, I'm trying to understand myself and who I am. I believe it takes time and it's different from person to person. Now little by little I've started to focus more. I'm starting to understand real life, what are my priorities and things that really matter. Here are some actual facts: I've started to earn some money (which I've never did before) which I believe it's already a small accomplishment. I did some babysitting and after 2 paid trial days (250 euros per day) shooting for rogue and Dior, I've got hired by one of the best fashion photographers called Paolo Roversi to be his assistant (paid job). I'm very happy and excited to work and learn from him which is better than any photography school. I'm ready to work as long as I need to in order to build my skills and stand out in that field. I think I've achieved some results and gained some value if I compare myself 2 years ago from now. Thanks to you I had the possibility to make many interesting experiences like Ferragamo in China and Alaia in Paris. Even though I didn't get hired from them, those experiences allowed me to understand what I like and what I don't like and shaped in part the person I am. Thanks to the Alaia internship and my passion for photography I am now working with Paolo Roversi doing what I really like. However even though I work hard and I am paid I cannot fully support myself to pay a rent and my living in Paris. I really would like to continue through this path, I feel it's the right one but I need your help, your support and your advices because I cannot make it by myself.

I promise I will use my money wisely without throwing it away into futilities like parties and holidays because I want to grow and build my skills, my career and hopefully my future self.

it's easy, go through the last two years of emails that you have sent me. search for the word "sorry". or phrase "I am sorry,"

how much money do you need? a month

2000 : 1500 rent + 500 food, for the rest I will earn it.

Would that be ok for you?