Re:

no thanks, I think it's more important that you start thinking of things other than what you want. get, take, etc.

thank god for all i got.? not how i can give, but for all I GOT / again

i never said you are not grateful, not sure why you are finding it so hard to understand, you think of getting getting getting and then getting.

I don't think so. You see, for example I'm going to Beijing now and I will be welcomed by my Chinese friend. When he came to Rome for the first time I spent days staying with him, showing him all the beautiful places, taking him out to dinner and trying to make him happy etc. Now that I am coming he told me he will come to pick me at the airport. When I answered it wasn't necessary he told me: "you treated me like a prince in your country, I want you to be a princess in mine, you are my Italian best friend" he did everything for me. This makes me think I'm not such a horrible person as you say.